I am my own worst enemy. Like Paul talks about in Romans, I do what I don’t want to do because of the sin living in me. When will I learn?
Romans 7:15-20 NIV
15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
When will I learn to rely soley on the Lord and not on my own strength?
When will finances, piling up medical bills and leaking roofs not make me freak out just a bit?
When will I remember not to worry about tomorrow? About what food we will eat or what clothes we will wear? Matthew 6:25-34
When will I trust the Lord to provide and care for all my needs? Proverbs 3:5-6
I feel like the answer is NEVER!! I’ve been a believer for over 20 years and my relationship with Jesus has always had an ebb and flow to it.
I always do what I want to do then remember, “Oh, I should probably pray about that”. Ugh! Why don’t I pray first?
I think most of the reason is I am selfish. I want what I want and of course, I want it now. I must not trust the Lord to give to me what I want. Although, IF our lives are lined up with the Spirit’s, what WE want is the same as what the Lord wants. In that case, we would always get what we want.
My focus is not on the Lord as it should be then. My focus is on me. Again, when will I learn? One thing I know about me, is I have to MAKE myself spend time with the Lord.
Years ago, I began waking up 30 minutes early to read the Word and pray. It really made a huge difference in my relationship with Jesus. Even though I was barely awake sometimes, the Lord’s Word never returns void. I still wake up early to spend time with Him.
However, in this age of electronics it’s too easy to get distracted. I read a couple devotions and then I open Facebook. Ugh! No, no, no! In no time, it’s either time to workout, or I just skip the workout for fb. Before I know it, it’s time to get ready for work and I’ve not even read much of the Word or prayed. I’ve considered deleting the fb app from my phone, but knowing me, I would just open up Pinterest, Instagram, Amazon or Offer UP.
It’s a heart issue. I have to change me and my behavior. Deleting those apps won’t change my heart.
1 Corinthians 10:13 NIV
13 No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.
I am my own worst enemy. I am too focused on myself to be focused on the Lord. I pray daily for the Lord to help me not be selfish and lazy, but I also have to do something about it. He prompts me to skip fb. He reminds me to workout, but it’s my choice. He gave me free will, but He also promises a way of escape.
Praise the Lord for His grace and mercy. He never gives up on me or you. He loves us completely and unconditionally. We can always improve our relationship with Him. As long as we do the next right thing. Like opening the Word. Start with the Psalms or Proverbs. Make it simple and pray for the Lords wisdom and understanding.
I know I can’t be the only one that gets distracted from the Lord. What keeps you from opening the Word? What is the next right thing you can do today to begin the change?
2 Replies to “I Am My Own Worst Enemy”
Thank you Lord for the………oh, look at the (insert whatever).
Yep, that’s me. I am the worst of all men when it comes to distractions.
Even with normal activities, what will take my wife 5 minutes to do will take me at least an hour; if not more.
And I pray I am not one who looks in the mirror and forgets what I look like as soon as I turn away. (James 1:22-24).
Distractions can do that.
I have to choose to take a step back, focus, concentrate, and let The Spirit quiet my soul before I can hear His still small voice. It’s then I am at peace.
It simply is a choice and the first choice that has to be made before starting my day.
To mirror who He is and who He is in me through-out the day and in all circumstances.
Husband, you have become so much more wise than you know. I am so proud of how far you’ve come in your walk. 458 🙂