What I Do When I’m Spiritually Dry
I can feel it. It’s happening again. I am becoming parched. It happens so slowly that at first I don’t even notice it. Then, over time I can feel myself become discontent. I become “sad” and grief takes hold of me again.
This time though, I’ve realized what is happening. I am Spiritually Dry. My heart hurts and I feel thirsty. I want the Word so desperately, but I can’t seem to find anything in the Word that I “want” to read. Nothing spikes my interest. I need worship, but I’ve been out of church the last few weeks and it would be so easy not to return. To get set in this rut and keep trudging along with no HOPE. It’s like desiring a glass of ice cold water, but being to lazy to get up off the couch and go get it.
This happens to me when I spend too much time with my mom. However, I can’t stop spending time with her, she is here because I am her family. She is here because she needs help to care for herself.
Last week we took a trip back to her home town for her 50th class reunion. That meant long driving hours with her and her dog. Lots of second hand smoke, the thickness of hopelessness coming from my mom and 100 degree weather. Each stop along the way was at least a 20 minute ordeal. Then, loading and unloading everything at 3 hotels. Not to mention the mediocre restaurant food. 2000 miles in 5 days. No worship, no Word, nothing much more that a devotion or two and some prayers for patience and peace. I’m tired.
My instinct is to be strong. To build walls to protect myself. I am strong. I can handle it. I don’t need help. That includes the Lord’s help. AND that’s were I go wrong every … single … time! Dang it!
My husband could see it coming. He didn’t know what it was, but he knew something was up. I kept it to myself for days. These walls had been going up for weeks. Several weeks before this trip, I began building walls to protect myself. We were after all, going back to the place where my daddy died. The last place I saw him alive. His birth place. The place he lived out the last 12 years of his life. The place I went to visit him every summer and several extra trips the last few years. And he wasn’t going to be there. His grave is there. The empty home is there. The memories are there, but he isn’t. Now, there is just pain. Grief. Loss. Hopelessness. “sigh”
So last weekend, Jeffrey and I began talking about how I was feeling. I wasn’t going to reveal the deep darkness in my heart to him. It causes him grief when he hears me say things like, ” I am spiritually dry”. “I don’t want to read the Word.” So it’s safer not to say anything at all. But when he knows something is up, I can’t really avoid it. I hate it when I am asked a direct question …
The great thing is, when I talked with him about what I was thinking and feeling, I felt better. I cried a little and that helps too.
He was able to help me gain perspective again. He was able to help me see hope in the future again. With hope came desire for the Lord and his word again.
I was able to pray and be specific with the Lord. I had ideas on how to proceed the next day and the days after that. Hope. It’s an amazing thing.
Before I began the process of building walls, I was reading in Romans. I like Romans. So, I began where I left off.
PSALM 42:2, My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?
ISAIAH 49:10, They will neither hunger nor thirst, nor will the desert heat or the sun beat down on them. He who has compassion on them will guide them and lead them beside springs of water.
MATTHEW 5:6, Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
Steps To Quench My Thirst
I prayed for the Lord to first, give me a love for Him and His word again. I prayed for protection from the enemy of hopelessness.
The other thing that helps me get back on track after a Spiritual Dry spell, is I get some exercise. I take care of my physical body as well as my spiritual body.
My favorite walking companion is always ready to hit the road.
So to recap, what I do when I’m spiritually dry…
I talk about it.
I pray about it.
I read the Word.
I take care of myself physically.
All those things get me back on track to a Hopeful, Joyful, Peaceful walk with the Lord and in life.
Do you every experience dry spells in your relationship with Christ? How do you handle them?
You can share your experiences in the Comment link at the top of this post.
I do hope you are enjoying your summer.